Tag Archives: women

Dryspell = A Return to Fundamentals

However  brief, I know this game has valleys and peaks. – Jay-Z “Can I Live”

The dry spell or drought. Now  before I expound on this phenomenon most men in the dating marketplace (game) have experienced known as a drought, let me refine what I consider a “drought.” What I consider a drought is more than a simple sexless drought. The man experiencing a true drought as defined by me must meet ALL of the following criteria:

  • It mustn’t be by choice
  • Prostitutes cannot break the drought
  • Current FWBs or women in the rotation cannot break the drought
  • Anything under your personal preference of a 7 cannot break the drought

It mustn’t be by choice

If there’s a rare occasion in which a man decides to give up the game for personal reasons such as familial obligations, work, refocus, etc., then he has chosen to be in a voluntary drought. Therefore, a man who is actively engaging with the opposite sex to get laid but has not been getting laid has met this criteria.
Prostitutes cannot break the drought

I am not against men patronizing escorts. Escorts and prostitutes, when priced right, can lower the control attractive non-working women have on the sexual marketplace. Patronizing escorts becomes a problem when a man begins to rely on them for sexual intimacy. Generally speaking, as opposed to regular women, prostitutes are always available for a certain specific monetary price; therefore, they cannot be used to break a drought or dry spell.

Current FWBs or women in the rotation cannot break the drought

The old harem. If a man successfully has a few quality women in rotation, then he could possibly never be in a “sexless drought.” It is the goal for many men who are in the game, to have sex on demand with any of a nice rotation of 3 or 4 quality women. However, this drought I speak of can only include new conquests. Friends With Benefits (FWBs), therefore, cannot break a drought or dry spell.
Anything under your personal perference of a 7 cannot break the drought

In my city, New Orleans, the effort it takes to be intimate with a 9 (there are no 10’s in my eyes) is an order of magnitude harder than an 8, which is an order of magnitude harder than a 7, and so on. I will not fault any man for taking some easy pickings to quell his thirst. We don’t want any violence to occur. However, if you get laid with someone you consciously consider less than your most liberal sexual preference, then no improvement is made and thus the drought or dryspell persists.


A Return to Fundamentals

A man will do as he pleases. In my personal worldview, these are the elements to a true drought. The sharpening of a man’s game who is not necessarily interested in exclusive relationships could only occur from chasing new conquests. Of course, there is something to be done about the drought. You’ve guessed it, I am currently in a long unexpected drought. Therefore, the fundamentals of the game during a drought are more important than ever:

  • Approach, approach, approach, approach, approach, ……..
  • Escalate far as possible at initial interaction
  • Set up dates with optimal logistics



Adopt an Abundance Mentality Immediately

In a very rare occurrence in which I can agree with a particular online website is the premise by which Plenty of Fish operates: there’s more fish in the sea. A large problem I see with my associates who struggle with women is that they have developed a scarcity mindset. Scarcity mindsets cause men to go to the club and literally fight over the women. Scarcity mindsets cause men to become white knights in hopes of saving a woman to then receive attention and sex from her, which never happens (fyi: I am not saying anything is wrong from saving someone in an emergency). Scarcity mindsets cause thirst on Instagram, thereby inflating the woman’s ego and increasing her sexual market “price.” All of these tendencies I’ve mentioned are classified with someone who has developed a scarcity mindset. These tendencies are counterproductive to being successful with multiple women.

Enter the abundance mentality: there’s more fish in the sea. As a man who has been proactively meeting more and more women since I’ve made my long-awaited return to the game, the abundance mentality may be more powerful than any other tool in the player’s toolbox. Approaching is key but understanding why a large volume of approaching is necessary, one must firstly adopt an abundance mentality. You might say, well in my city most of the women are fat, bitchy, have kids, married, boyfriend, in jail, etc. Nevertheless, there are still some gems left in your city, depending on its size. I made the following chart to further illustrate my point. It is a snapshot of available attractive black women ages 17-35 in New Orleans (Orleans Parish proper):

women chart of new orleans


It does not take a scientist to throw one  of these together for your city. Back to the point, scarcity mindsets make more sense in rural areas, where the women are actually scarce. In these somewhat rare cases, it may be important to become the big fish in a little pond. However, 80.7% of Americans live in urban areas, according to the 2010 Census. That’s 4 out of every 5 Americans. So for the vast majority of Americans, there is no need to have a scarcity mindset. My men, adopt an abundance mentality immediately so we can stop the violence in the club, lower the attractive woman’s ego, and increase the camaraderie between males thereby eradicating the phenomenon of white knighting.

Dallas-Ft. Worth Women (A General Introduction)

The following is a guest post by NolaAmbassador:

I want to begin this post by first taking note of how excited I am about the New Orleans Renaissance that has been taking place. It has been a while since I’ve been back home, but NolaMan tellls me very good things.  But of course, hosting last year’s Super Bowl and this year’s NBA All Star Game, does have a tendency to help just a bit in addition to the other infamous events that take place here. Due to my occupation and my future entrance into graduate school, I am not living in New Orleans at the moment. The Dallas-Ft. Worth area is where my embassy (bachelor pad apartment) is located. I am about 25 minutes from uptown Dallas, my play-ground and my hunting-ground, where I prefer to do most of my socializing. Nonetheless, I’d like to introduce myself properly. I am the NolaAmbassador.

Aside from working, studying, and going to the gym, it is indeed healthy for a young bachelor to have a dating life. I have been living in the metroplex for 4 years now. Needless to say, I have had considerable success during my invasion of the area, campaign, whatever u want to call it. NolaMan, in his latest post, offered his critique of African-American woman in New Orleans. I will be the first to say, on the NolaManBlog, that there are considerable differences and similarities in the metroplex to say the least. NolaMan, my close friend and confidant, was interested in provoking a response from me, in regards to his article on Black women. After four years of living in the DFW area, I feel that there has been an adequate amount of time to establish my perceptions of the women here…of course, deem them “legitimate.” Ultimately, these are my observations in written form, which apply not only to Black women in the DFW area, but women of all ethnicities.



Dallas women are very pleasant for the most part, even at night. There’s a common belief that women are in a cat-like state during the day, and dogs at night. The women of Dallas are indeed in a cat-like state during the day, but at night, they are more of the “lioness” variety, and are even quite aggressive in their pursuit of men. Being a young man in my late twenties, I have even encountered a few “cougars.” At the bars, I tend to make casual conversation with women, about a variety of topics and current events, concealing my intentions initially. Undoubtedly, my experiences have been pleasant. A significant number of women have even bought drinks for me at bars and they flat-out refuse when I try repeatedly to return the favor. Phone numbers are easy to obtain, but with North Texas women, I feel that a genuine connection, which can be accomplished by a 15 minute convo at the bar (believe it or not), is what they deeply desire. Surprisingly, this pleasant attribute of Dallas ladies applies to Dallas women of “all” ethnicities, including of course, Black women.  Also, some women even find it strange when long conversations are initiated with them without even asking for a number. It’s almost as if I’m obligated to take it if she shows interest. The only variable that may affect this observation is the fact that the DFW area is home to a lot of women who have moved from other places, including Oklahoma, California, Louisiana, etc., due to the stable economy. Most women that I have socialized with are from Texas, but there are quite a few from other places in the U.S. as well.



What attracts me to a woman are her feminine qualities. The women of Dallas have this, generally speaking, but not all. There are bad types everywhere. The pros of increased femininity  are that these women are not too outspoken, tend to wear heels and dresses in the uptown Dallas area (I have a passion for dresses and heels), and of course…drum roll…they smile and make eye contact to signal their attraction. On the flip-side, a lot of them tend to be shy, timid, and reserved. As a result of this, it takes a while for them to open up. But hey, at least the bros don’t have to tremble at the thought of brutal rejection. That does not occur here, unless of course you’re an asshole or the female just really doesn’t like you. I’ve been an asshole (of the milder variety) plenty of times and still had success.



And lastly…what I love most about Dallas women are that they do not flake at all. They show up on time, usually five minutes early to dates (if you and her are meeting up), they answer text messages right away, phone calls, and even emails promptly, and with enthusiasm. But unfortunately, I’m full of sh*t. Sorry, but I had to see if you would fall for that. While the women of the metroplex are indeed friendly and feminine, they are as flaky and fake as it gets. Without a doubt, this is the nature of the dating game/culture in America, for the most part. Getting a phone number is great, but don’t expect a “pick up” or “text reply” unless she’s actually into you. Girls here love to pretend that they are attracted or interested in you. How do you know if she’s really into you?? You Don’t. I’ve had sex with girls who gave me their numbers with a stoic, unenthusiastic face. On the other hand, I’ve been repeatedly flaked on by women who gave me their number with a smile, giggle, “f**k me face,” and even reiterated that I “better call them or else.” Texas girls tend to give their number to guys that they aren’t even into. Fortunately and “unfortunately”, there is an increased value of male attention here. The good news is that if you walk up to the girl of your dreams, no matter how hot she is, she’ll probably give you the time of day and even a 5-10 minute conversation. Your bar/club/lounge audience won’t even be able to gain the pleasure of chuckling at your humiliating rejection, because most of the time, there isn’t a flat out rejection. Bad news is, the phone number you obtained means nothing, unless she’s actually into you. Due to the flakiness and exaggerated politeness, its hard to tell. Regardless of the phony personalities you may encounter…take up the numbers, engage in conversation, and you will score regardless. It’s a numbers game, after all.



All in all, you will find your experience with Dallas women to be enjoyable. If your lady friend at the bar was auditioning for a movie role or an Academy Award, then at least she saved you the embarrassment of rejection. And if she was actually into you, then I’m pretty sure you had a great time with her later on that night, or maybe a few days/weeks later. At the end of the day, my best advice is to be a man, be aggressive, and call it like you see it. With a little persistence and assertiveness…You will score here regardless.

Go Forth and Conquer,





The Game has Returned to my Life

Out of nowhere, things occurred during my long term relationship (LTR) to cause a major downward spiral. Boom! Crash! Pow! Splat! and just like that I’m back in the game. The game, which I have been back in for the past 6 months or so, has been altered since I have last been involved in it in 2008. Luckily, I have been well read on game literature before the devolution of my LTR. Ironically, I stumbled upon game literature as a means to assist with my relationship woes. Despite learning techniques via game literature to improve my LTR, it takes two to tango (yes I said the cliche) and if total participation is not there, then improvements are hard to come by. Nevertheless, the knowledge gained from game literature has revealed an epiphany since the game itself, essentially, is a numbers game. The more access/exposure to different women, the better the chance to find someone I am looking for. I have reentered what I consider to be the rat-race in the game market, similar to the rat-race in the corporate market. Just as in the corporate market, there are things you can do to increase your marketability such as developing new in-demand skills and networking. In the dating market, one can learn skills (game) and networking (approaching) to be able to thrive in the sexual market.

Being exposed to game content has ever-broadened my horizons and I look forward to experiencing foreign lands as the United States is only 5% the world population. I am proud to be an American, even if I am “black” on paper; however, I am interested in what the world has to offer. I knew many guys in high school who were excellent with women. They were considered naturals. I had always relied on my height, looks, and decent dancing abilities to get ladies. I have realized, it takes much more than those abilities to compete in America. I will take strides to make sure I am competitive in America but also venture into foreign lands to get a better ROI. At the end of the day, I am back and better than ever.

In the words of Juelz Santana: “I’m baaaaaaaaack, uh ohhhhhhh!”


3 Ways Black Women from New Orleans are Great




After giving you some of the more negative attributes of New Orleans’ colored women, I have to give you a few positive attributes of the black women here for one MAJOR and timely reason. Firstly, I am not being apologetic for the hit-piece I wrote on New Orleans’ black women earlier. It is the truth and the truth hurts. However, the major reason I have decided to write a pleasant article on New Orleans’ black women is due to how the women responded to the true advent of the spring season. The timing of the confluence of the 2014 spring season and French Quarter Festival worked in unison; its own version of the planets aligning. What I am talking about here is what we, the men of New Orleans, have been waiting for since October of 2013 because of the long winter that ensued: summer dresses, short shorts, long sexy legs, and skin skin skin skin skin. I think you get the picture. Saturday, April 12, 2014 was by far the most robust display of tits, legs, skin, and butts from our sistahs thus far this year and maybe since Essence Fest 2013. This display even blew away Mardi Gras 2014. How is that even possible? Well, it happened. Witnessing this even has enabled me to realize something special about the black women from New Orleans, that it would be remiss of me to not dedicate a positive post to these women who for the majority of the time piss me off. Here are three ways colored women from New Orleans are Great:

1. Black Women from New Orleans dress very sexy when it’s warm outside

Goodbye jeans, black tights (will be missed a bit), ugg boots, wool coats, knit caps and hello to the summer dresses, booty shorts, jean shorts with rips at the bottom, among other delicacies. It’s been a minute since I’ve seen you all. It’s good to have you all back in my life. The women here will dress very provocatively during the daytime to attract men even if their own attitudes are incongruent. Deep down, I’m betting on this spring summer to be the impetus to higher quality and higher quantity of pussy in my life since I’ve been back in the game for 6 months or so. I am excited to be alive right now (even with one final supposed cold snap that’ll last a couple of days). But just check this itinerary: FQ Fest, Easter, Jazz Fest, Memorial Day… It’s gonna be a lot of skin exposure very very very very soon. There’s no way to not come up in this environment. I just Got to stay strapped when I’m inside those legs though.

2. Black Women from New Orleans shake their butts (twerk) with the best of them

I’ve been to black urban night spots in New York, NY, across Central Florida, Memphis, TN, Dallas TX, Atlanta Georgia, Jackson, MS, Baton Rouge, LA, among other locations. I haven’t been out in the Midwest and West Coast so it remains to be seen how our women stack up to women in those places in the twerk department. However, I would put any money that I’ve seen the best jiggles right here at home. Other places can compare only in the sense that they are willing to dance with men. It is very seldom in New Orleans for young colored women to grind on men. That started to cease in about 2002. Nevertheless, it is a spectacle to see.

3. Black Women from New Orleans just simply are attractive

The facial features and skin tones of the colored women are great and consistent across the board. I am not one of the black men who prefer light skinned women per se but I can attest that the mix is very extraordinary when it is combined with wild hair, curvy bodies (not fat but true curvy bodies), and long legs. Black women in New Orleans for those who do not know range from almost passing for white to black as night. The average is somewhere in between the extremes. It is mostly light brown skinned women who wear red lipstick and it is just incredible.


I am not solely a complaint maker. I appreciate the things that I like and I give credit where it is due. This spring has sprung forth some new vibrancy into the black women of New Orleans. They have responded greatly with their great outfits and sexy bodies.

red pink shirt fqfestphoto

3 Ways Black Women from New Orleans Suck

So when you participate in discourse about the most desirable black women in the United States, you hear about Atlanta’s black women with their Georgia peaches and southern hospitality, New York black women with their sophistry and class, and Los Angeles/Cali black women with their cool demeanor and laid back attitudes. Every once in a while however, New Orleans black women would be thrown into the discussion and positive attributes such as the Creole Lady Marmalade, voodoo sex dolls, and black southern belle would be released out of someone’s mouth. Not…. so….fast, buddy.

Aside from the few things that make New Orleans black women palatable, such as being able to twerk better than possibly the entire world, wearing tight outfits with heels at the club, and being above average in looks for black women of American cities, a lot of black women in this town have negative attributes that make you want to wring their necks. Here they are:

1. The attractive black women of New Orleans don’t answer the phone/respond to texts and are super flaky

I am sure this occurs other places. However, this just does not occur as much in other places I have been. Just to recap on what I am taking about is the tendency of attractive black women from New Orleans who decide to give you their phone number but decide to not answer the call or respond to text. Even worse, women will agree on a date with you then cancel at the last-minute due to any number of reasons. Okay cool, things happen and lots of the time and she cannot meet. However, some reasons are not reasons but excuses in my opinion, such as, “i feel sick (but talking to me in a normal voice)” and “my friend is having a crisis.”  I am back in the game after a 6 year and some change LTR (long-term relationship) that went awry. The game, today, has shifted into another paradigm since I was last involved in 2008. Texting is the normal form of communication and talking on the phone is “old school.” Flakiness has increased tenfold from what I can remember. One reason I characterize the black women of New Orleans this way is because I meet black women in New Orleans who are from other cities and they don’t have these extreme flake tendencies. When I text, they text back. When I call, they pick up. When I invite them to meet up, they show up.

2. They wear too many unnecessary accessories

In America, the model of feminine desire is the thin woman with big tits and long-flowing hair. Black women can fit the thin part and even accentuate it with their own better tits and or bigger butts. However, the long-flowing hair does not occur naturally in most black women. The women who lack the ability to have this type of hair accommodate this “shortcoming” by applying relaxers into their hair even early in childhood. These relaxers are largely the culprit which causes hair problems later on in adulthood. Hence, the weave and extensions sprout up and they are here to stay. I do not have a problem with weave per se. I oftentimes do not like the way they smell. Perhaps I can invent a weave air freshener and make them smell better. I try to be empathetic as possible in regards to extensions, however, they are not as essential as black women tend to make them. Well done weaves and natural hairstyles can work well.

Weaves are not the main reason, I’m writing this, I am writing this to bring awareness to shame the use of fake eyebrows. These are the worst things to happen to the black women since Scrillex haircuts. Women in New Orleans are always striving to the be the most up-to-date in fashion which sometimes backfires. These eyelashes are not attractive at all. Take them out and throw them in the garbage.

Lastly, the amount of makeup that these women wear is disgusting. The times I have woken up beside a woman who had removed her makeup who appeared to not be the same person is astronomical. I prefer for a woman to wear minimal makeup. There’s no need to hide the acne with endless makeup. It gets on my clothes and bed sheets and is hard to wash out. We as men don’t wear that, why should you.

3. The majority of them are fat

New Orleans has unfortunately remained in the top 10 cities for highest murder rate since I was born in 1986 and a long time before that as well. The vast majority of people who die from these violent crimes are young black men from about ages 16-35. This would suggest that there are many more black females in this age range than males. The numbers suggest that this is true. This is a travesty that goes on in many major American cities, the loss of life of the black male. Also, a larger number of black males are incarcerated since they are largely the perpetrators in these crimes in New Orleans. Since a smaller number of black males exist in New Orleans due to violent crime and incarceration, there could only be a surplus of black women. That is correct but also problematic. The loss of the black male in cities across the United States is a major problem indeed. From a sexual marketplace standpoint, the black men in this age range who are not incarcerated and are alive are in a position to gain from this. Simple supply and demand economics: less males around = less competition/more males = more competition.

So getting back as to why this is problematic brings us to another dimension of the sexual marketplace of black New Orleans. Just go ahead and blame the greasy food, the carefree attitude, babies, American diet, fast food, the over-reliance on motor vehicles, poverty, the boogeyman, voodoo, Obama, or anyone else except the person in the reflection on the mirror on why in the hell there are sooooooooooooo many fat and overweight black women in New Orleans. The “advantage” in the sexual marketplace for living black men due to the decrease in males due to violent crimes and incarceration in New Orleans is negated since there are so many fat and overweight black women. Overweight and fat women are undesirable but they are aplenty in New Orleans. For you rare chubby-chasers and Shallow Hals out there, you will have a feast in New Orleans.

But guess what???? There’s a solution: Fat and overweight ladies, simply eat 25% less food than before and you will begin to lose weight and become more desirable to higher quality males. Cut your meal into four equal pieces and don’t eat one of the pieces.


If New Orleans’ black women were to resolve these three things about themselves, New Orleans will be able to again boast as having the most beautiful black women in the United States with the Creole Lady Marmalade titles among everything else. Ladies, simply fix these three things and you will get your Pelican or Saint almost instantly. Ladies, I say all this because I love you am not afraid to tell you. Now, the woman beneath this has kids what’s your excuse? Because she’s rich, no, she takes care of herself.

vanessa williams and kids


How to Get Girls at Bars with Outdoor Seating

A very specific type of game is needed for a popular style of bar here in New Orleans. These types of bars have courtyards/outdoor seating. Much of the talent (fine women) are outdoors in the courtyard sitting with oftentimes mixed groups or among themselves. They are 99% drinking draft beers in large cups. This allows the women to chat together away from the bar causing them to nurse the beer. This type of setup calls for cold approaches. If you have not come with your own girls, cold approaching is the only way to succeed in this if you are not tied up into their social circle any kind of way. Therefore, in order to maximize the return of these types bars are to follow this steps:

1. It is better to take  a competent wingman with you

Since most girls will be here with groups, it will be better (not mandatory) to bring a cool wingman who can hold a conversation with you. You do not want to have to do all of the talking the entire time with two women, but who knows, maybe you can finagle a threesome out of it (1 in 50 chance). The wingman will be there to help the conversation flow smoothly. Make sure you decide on who wants who. Having a pair of women is more doable than 3+, at that point, cockblocking and ugly girl percentages increase.

2. Meet girls who are ordering drinks

These girls are either just showing up to find seats to be able to sit down and need a beer. These are also girls who were already seated and are getting their next round. This is the absolutely best time to approach them. Simply say, “hey, what kind of beer are you getting,” and take it from there.

3. Try to have a seat with said girls

After you have a built up a little rapport with the women, you can say “let’s go find a seat” to continue discussing, navel oranges and how they look like mammalian nipples while sitting. Be the man to find the seats and lead them there.

4. Take them home

At this point of the night, where a few rounds have been drunk, touching has been taking place, and perhaps a kissing session or two, it is time to take them to the next spot, the crib for further sexual activity. Simply say, let’s get out of here and take a cab back to the place. Smash like a champ!

Results may vary.